Decisions, decisions….
Posted by Chuck on September 24th, 2007
My wife has a birthday on Wednesday. She’ll be 37. I’ve been trying to decide what I should get her as a gift. It’s not an easy decision. I mean, what do you get for the woman who has everything? And by everything I mean, me. She’s got her hands full with me, literally and figuratively (or should I say physically). But I recognize that having the perfect husband isn’t always everything. Sometimes you want a little something extra. That’s why I visited my local “adult store” and took a few pictures of some potential gifts. I thought I’d let y’all help me decide.
Now this is a gift everyone woman should own. Knee pads! They could be used to provide comfort whilst giving some sloppy head to the king of the castle. Once that’s over she could use them to make floor scrubbing easier. Two gifts in one!
No woman should be without come good quality stripper shoes. I found these to be especially attractive. They’re functional, plus they can be used as a kind of mirror when she’s got her legs propped up against my shoulders. I could look over, check my teeth, while I’m tappin’ dat azz, yo. The price tag makes them even look better…..$19.95!
Now this is just too hard to pass up. Hello? What’s better than to dispense the soap she uses to wash her hands from a penis shaped pump? Yeah, I know what you’re thinking…I’m thinking it too. I’d need to get two of them so they’d be a matching set in the master bath.
Finally, I couldn’t help but check out the dildo aisle. Y’all know I’m out of town a lot and I suppose having a fake one is okay when the real McCoy isn’t around. Maybe I should hook her up with a lifelike play mate. Y’all see any that catches your eye? I’m thinking the “Great American” brand would be best. I believe it’s important to be patriotic while masturbating.
I appreciate y’all taking the time to check out my potential gift options. I really did take the pictures a while back with my old phone. Please…don’t hesitate to let me know which I should choose. Also, if you have a better suggestion let me hear it!
Alrighty…I’m off to the wonderful world of Food Shows again this week. I hope you all have a great one. I’ll check back in a day or two.