My Kids Mean The World To Me…
Posted by Chuck on May 21st, 2007
The lives of my children aren’t as easy as some kids out there. Yes, they have a very loving father who thinks they can (usually) do no wrong. And they have a step-mother who loves them, but can dish it out in the tough love format at times. My kids are responsible for daily and weekly chores. The thirteen year old empties the dishwasher everyday, folds laundry everyday and cleans her room and bathroom perfectly once a week. My six year old makes his bed every morning, cleans his room, dusts his bedroom furniture and television and sometimes helps out with the cleaning downstairs when I ask. They both help out with the dog and cat, letting Trooper out when he needs to do his business, and going out to pour food into the cat’s dish out on the deck when she’s hungry. They help out a lot and I think it’s important to their development into healthy and functioning adults. They may not like it when they have to clean, but I’m sure one day they’ll thank me for teaching them something they need to know.
I mention this, with emphasis on the first sentence I wrote up there, because I want to tell you about the weekend they spent with their mother. I picked them up yesterday around 4 and brought them home, but before that happened let me give you a little back ground.
I took the kids over to their mom’s apartment Saturday ’round three o’clock. My ex, FA, was due to be home soon after. She’d been in nursing school clinical’s all day. She got home as expected and I assumed she’d be taking the kids to do something fun during her 25 hours she’d be spending with them. Maybe to see a movie or perhaps to the pool. Well my daughter T called me last night around 9 pm just to check on how things were going. I asked her what all had been going on there and she informed me they’d gone to Target and to dinner and now her brother was watching television, she was on the computer, and her mother had gone to bed. I thought it was a little early for dear old mom to be hitting the sack when she hadn’t seen her kids in two weeks, but I didn’t let it bother me.
Fast forward to yesterday around two in the afternoon. I called my daughter’s cell to see what they were up to. She informed me that she was on the computer, her brother L was watching television, and their mother was in bed. I asked, “Oh, did she recently lay down for a nap?”
“No Dad, she’s still asleep from when she went to bed last night at nine o’clock.”
Yes folks…she hasn’t been with her kids (other than a couple hours on Mother’s Day) for over two weeks and she spent the whole time sleeping. I promptly told T I was on my way to pick up she and her brother and bring them home.
When I got there the ex was up and awake. She paid me the $400 she owed me in child support and I just shook my head thinking, how could anyone who had given birth to her own children care as little as she does about their happiness? The day will come, and it’s pretty much here for my 13 year old, when they will realize exactly what it is their mother is. Then they’ll not want to spend any time with her. It’s easy to see….I just can’t understand why it is she can’t see it.
So…Anyway….I thought I’d show y’all a couple pictures of my precious babies. This is my boy L on the soccer field. It was taken last Saturday during their last game. The Blue Devils finished the season 9-1-1. A pretty good record for a league where they don’t keep score. I like this picture, even though it’s terribly blurry, because you can see the total determination on his face. Every muscle in his legs are flexed, he’s ready to get in there and score that winning goal! It looks like both his feet aren’t even touching the ground. I’ve just noticed that his left hand looks deformed, but it isn’t!
Then here we have his sister. My beautiful daughter who is growing up before my eyes. She’ll be finished with the eighth grade in four days and will be moving on to the high school as a freshman. I can’t believe it! Susan and I have been pretty much raising this young woman by ourselves for four years. I’ve been there for her first kiss, and made her hold up a sign saying “My first kiss was (input date here).” Then took a picture. When she yelled from the upstairs bathroom that she’d gotten her period I was the one who sent my new wife up to give her the first pad, then later had her pose with a sign saying “I got my period on (insert date here).” I’m sure she hated posing for both of those pictures, but I’m sure she’ll appreciate it someday. I love these kids more than my life. I just can’t imagine giving birth, not seeing them but two or three times a month, then spending 17 hours out of 24 sleeping and missing out on all they have to say and do. I just thank God that He saw fit to allow me to have full custody.
Here’s a picture I took of my daughter T a little over a week ago. She was all excited about seeing her brother kick some soccer butt, and spending time with my sister, her aunt. Oh, and she was liking the swing.
Well folks, it’s Monday and I’m home again after being out of town pretty much for the past two weeks. Susan is out of town this week, in Atlanta, for her job. I reckon I’m somewhat of a bachelor till Thursday evening. Anyone want to come party with Chuckie?
May 21st, 2007 at 6:19 am
I can’t believe I’m FIRST here! That NEVER happens!
You have much to be thankful for and proud of. You have two beautiful children and you and Susan are great parents. I know you said they don’t have it the easiest out there and that may be true but I bet they don’t see things as badly as maybe you do. What they see (or will see as they grow older) is a Dad who stepped up - a step-mom that stepped in and they have a nucleus of a loving family to grow up in. And you know what Chuck, I commend you — because while you rant and rave here about the Ex and while we chatted numerous times about those times and her terrible state of mothering (and lack thereof), you never bring your children into it — you have allowed them time with her when you felt it was warranted (given her current state of mind or behavior at the time) and you haven’t denied them of knowing her. Without you ever saying a word, they will learn who and what their mother is all about on their own and they will be thankful that you allowed them to form their own opinions about her.
The pictures are great and you DO have some genes there!
Welcome back!
May 21st, 2007 at 6:20 am
^ * meant to say “great genes” up there!
May 21st, 2007 at 6:46 am
You’re kids are beautiful. That’s a shame about their Mom. She’ll have plenty regrets when they’re grown and bother with her as little as she bothered with them. At least they have you and Susan as a constant in their lives.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:19 am
Oh Chuck. You know, every time I read your posts about EW, I nod my head. It’s almost like your ex and my husband’s ex were separated at birth. OUR EW decided to “hose the kids off” in the back yard this weekend instead of letting them bathe in her house. She said because they had red hair spray in their hair (from crazy hair day), she didn’t want it in her bathtub. UM, HELLO! That shit rinses right out!
I can’t believe L and T. I remember seeing their pics just a few years ago when we started blogging. L is getting BIG! WOW. And T looks a LOT like her daddy. So is she into emo/goth or whatever? I REALLY like her hair!
I can’t wait until the day when my kids realize what a terrible waste of air their mother is. Like you said, T is already thinking about that. Thank god they have you, Chuck. Really.
May 21st, 2007 at 8:00 am
I won’t say don’t worry about the kids, because it is a parents job to worry, and guide, and LOVE kids. It often is a tough job, but you do it well - because you care. Both kids know that. And yes, we know they will catch on to their mother’s weird behavior. I hope it does not hurt too much. The way it hurts all rather depends on how you handle things. You will do the best you can, and they will understand. Oh but having a teenager - somehow everyone does survive that. And both kids are beautiful.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:31 am
Ok, first….. you are a fantastic father, one of the very best I know. Second, there is absolutely no need to worry. Your children will learn soon enough (T already has to some extent) that FA is worthless. The whole situation is a mess, and you have handled yourself as well as you can. YOU are the example that they need. She is the anti-example. Kinda like those drug commercials. She’s the frying pan.
Keep doing what you’re doing! Those kids are awesome, I know this for a fact! The life they have at home (the only home they have) is going to be the one that they remember and strive to live up to. The life with their “mother” is going to be the one they strive to prevent with their own kids.
Great pics of the kids, but honestly folks, they are even more beautiful in person!!!
May 21st, 2007 at 10:41 am
awww, chuckie. that was a very, very sweet post. i am so sorry that your ex would do that to your children. some people should just never be parents.
your kids are freaking adorable. i think if t and my oldest got together we’d be in for some serious trouble. she’s really beautiful (don’t know that i’ve ever seen her pic before)
they are very lucky to have you as a father. very lucky.
May 21st, 2007 at 12:01 pm
They are both adorable, & they do the same chores as my kids! Keep up the good work, Chuck!
May 21st, 2007 at 12:15 pm
SoSweet - Hey, I was first on your’s last night! Thanks for your kind words, and yes…all their good genes they got from me!
Khaki - Thank you! Yes, I wouldn’t want to be anything else but their constant.
Kelli - Yes ma’am I do think they were separated at birth. Deadbeat moms suck!
Rosie - Thank you for what you’ve said here. I means a lot!
Julie - Just one of the best? Uh, hello? lol You’re right…and I love your frying pan comparison!
Laurie - Thanks girl that was very sweet! Yep, we should get the kids together one day!
NoOne - Thanks lady. Gotta keep ‘em doing those chores!
May 21st, 2007 at 12:40 pm
Great looking kids Chuckie…I’m impressed they came from you
Hell, you know I’d come and party with ya if work didn’t get in the way.
By the way, Susan sends her love and she said she’d be home Thursday!
(lol…couldn’t help that)
Call me anytime bud.
May 21st, 2007 at 12:41 pm
And by the way again, you’ve stepped up to the plate as a Dad, Chuck.
Nice job.
Your ex will only realize what she’s missing out on w=once it’s too late from the looks of it. Sucks to be her.
May 21st, 2007 at 1:41 pm
Fuck that bitch. Not literally of course. I’m over shitty mothers dude. You’re kids are lucky to have you.
May 22nd, 2007 at 8:04 am
Chuck, I think you are a wonderful dad. Your post brought tears to my eye’s. Your kid’s are beautiful, thanks for sharing the pictures. Sending you lot’s of Big Big Hug’s!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
May 22nd, 2007 at 2:19 pm
how could anyone as butt crack ugly as you father two such good looking kids,
FA sucks.
I am glad you have custody. it is good of you to allow her to see them, i am too spitefull and would have cut her off.
May 22nd, 2007 at 5:51 pm
Slick - Dude, you be so funny! Hey, we’re going to party it up here sometime soon.
Peggy - True dat sista.
Sandy - You’re too sweet hon. Thanks!
Snagley - I remember a time when you didn’t think my butt crack was ugly……. lol
May 25th, 2007 at 10:20 am
Khaki nailed it when she said “at least they have you and Susan as the constant in their lives”. This will prove to be the bond that the mother will never be able to experience with them. Keep it up. You two are doing fine and it shows in the joy on their faces.
May 28th, 2007 at 10:00 pm
So proud of you man. Yer ex must have serious problems to be actin’ like that. It’s great to see that your priorities are set in the right place. Beutiful kids.
May 29th, 2007 at 10:11 am
They’re GORGEOUS Chuck!
Then again, so are you with all your mad parenting skillz! lol
Like everyone else has said …. what you & Susan give them will be what they remember most, and strive for.
You RAWK!!!!!