Well it’s been three days shy of five months. Nearly five months since I’ve last posted here on my blog. In all those days I’ve thought about posting at least once every two weeks or so. I’ve wanted to get on here and let you all know what’s been going on with your old buddy Chuck. But there has been some good that’s come from pushing the blog aside. I’ve been able to focus on the other things in life that are much more important. Those things would definitely be in the area of family and work. Last night I spent a couple hours reading some of my posts from 2005 and 2006. As I was reading I realized that I really used to write some entertaining and informative shit. It really made me get that urge to pick up where I’d left off.

I’ve also, in the past five months, come a long way in the struggle with the ex wife. If you’ve read the last couple of posts here, then you know at the time I stopped blogging I was dealing with a lot of shit involving my ex’s behavior and my desire to protect my two children. Well that’s all worked out for the best. On December sixth I was granted full custody and she now has no unsupervised visitation. (In the past we were joint custodians, although I had primary custodianship.) Now her visitation is based on my choice, and if I don’t want them around her I don’t have to allow it. In her absence my kids are positively thriving, by the way.

But there has been so much more that’s been going on over the past five months. How about I present for you here an entire bullet point listing of the excitement that’s been my life, in no particular order, since September. If you’d like additional info on any of these feel free to ask…

• Sued my ex for full custody, and she declined to show up for the hearing.
• Bought a new 2007 Honda Pilot.
• Traveled to Virginia for Thanksgiving.
• Suffered from pneumonia and pleurisy.
• Spent time in the hospital.
• Traveled to Tucson, Arizona for a company meeting.
• Vomited on myself while traveling home on Interstate 65. I kept on driving.
• Rode a mechanical bull and didn’t fall off.
• Had anal sex with my wife for the third time.
• My daughter embraced being emo and dyed her hair black.
• Once again I’ve started on a low carb lifestyle and have lost 15 pounds in the past two weeks.
• Entertained my Mother-in-law and sister-in-law here for Christmas.
• Consistently have had unprotected sex with my wife. (Reckon we’re trying to have a baby?)
• Have had to put my 13-year-old daughter on restriction for bad grades.
• Found myself resenting my dog Trooper because he seems to have a better relationship with my wife than I do.
• I’ve continued to go to Sport Clips for haircuts, but without getting an erection.
• Am on prescription medication for blood pressure and triglycerides.
• Have become addicted to the reality shows; I love New York, American Idol (no surprise there…GO BIRMINGHAM!!), Two-A-Days, and Top Chef.
• Shed a tear or two when Dixie died on All My Children.
• Ended a lifelong relationship with my favorite cousin.
• Taken an active roll in helping my daughter move away from her emo inclinations.
• Kept up a close relationship with my best bud Julie.
• Had my personal computer crash, losing all my family pictures from the past two years. This has hurt…seriously.
• Been very worried when my old college roommate Bo Snagley had a terrible car accident.
• Have made continual use of my manscaping personal body trimmer. My balls/nut sack remains silky smooth.
• Listened to my ex-wife cry because her boyfriend committed suicide.
• Missed an occasion to meet with Southern Sweetheart face to face because I was sick as hell and in the bed.
• Discovered a love for Old Navy sleep bottoms.
• Celebrated a wonderful Christmas.
• Accepted that Julie stole my “girl dog name” to use for her own new dog. I’ve accepted it and moved on, Dammit, I never should’ve told her…
• Watched every episode of Arrested Development and found myself wishing that show had never been taken off the air.
• Again accidentally showed my penis to a neighbor woman. This time I wish it hadn’t happened.
• Haven’t read or commented on many blogs….this will end.
• Discovered my ex has made 8 (as far as I know) attempts on her own life over the past two and a half years.
• Had a wonderful and productive 2006 with my company.

As you can see I’ve been quite busy over the past five months. The list above is only a small portion of what’s been going on. There is so much I’d love to blog about. As I remember more I’ll be sure to post about any other points of interest. Right now it’s very early on the morning of the second of February (I’ll set this to post later in the morning). Actually I’m thinking I should close up things now and go to bed. It’s been a very long day! I hope you all have a wonderful Friday and a good weekend. I’m sure most of you have deleted me from your blogrolls. Feel free to add me back, if you’d like. I plan on returning to blogging with a vengeance! This blogosphere forum is where I belong.

Chuck’s back, bitch!! Talk to you all soon!